JUST MY IMAGINATION

2 min read I got new journals today: 2022 ones and some plain notebooks. No need to mention that I am a journal addict. I also revised the 2021 ones. Because you know, why not? By doing that, I have noticed something. My 2-month-ago problems now seem ridiculous. Not to mention my troubles from a year ago. For instance, did you know that I couldn’t ride my bike for the first 2 weeks because I was too afraid? Of course, you did not know. Even though I know how to ride a bike very well and live in a country where there are bike paths everywhere and cyclists are highly respected. Doesn’t matter. I had been suffering from this anxiety so bad. I kept buying bike accessories but never started cycling.  Then I moved to a new neighbourhood and things got complicated. I had lived on google maps for days. This one was just the tiniest one of my problems. But no one knows because everyone is handling their problems alone. I remember messaging one of my close friends something like: shoul...

  2 mins read Another year is coming to an end. There are literally 14 days left and I am so not ready for that. This year has been a roller coaster on so many levels. I don’t know even where to begin. New year's resolutions? Well, the ones that I made four years ago are still waiting for me to take care of them. So, probably no. Because life does not work that way. I already have lived so many unexpected things this year. It is not going to be according to my resolutions anyway.  Avicii says, ‘ he said one day you will leave this world behind, so live a life you will remember .’* But isn’t all lives worth remembering? I remember everything I have come across in this life. Not all of them were thrilling or necessarily pleasant. But still, all of them were memorable.  So, the concept of living a full of life is overrated. Life is already full of something. We just have to be there- physically and more importantly emotionally. Last year I spent my last week of the y...

  1 min read Dinlediğim ilk andan itibaren hemen loopa aldığım güzide şarkı. Birkaç gündür kulaklık kulağımda olduğu her an çalıyor. Mor ve ötesinin eski şarkılarını çok sevdiğim zaten sır değil. Ama bu şarkısına neden bu kadar vuruldum? S anırım  yaşadığım son olaylar üzerine biraz merhem gibi geldi. Sözlerini direkt kendi üzerime aldım. Hatta bir adım ileriye gidip bu şarkıyı kendime armağan etmek istiyorum.  Kendime ve konfor alanının tamamen dışına çıkıp, hiç yapamayacağım dediği şeyleri yapan,  zorluklarını  sineye çekip güzel taraflarını görmeye çalışan, her düştüğünde öyle ya da böyle tekrar ayağa kalkmasını becerebilen, y uvasından  ayrılıp binlerce km ötede okumaya gitmiş bütün gurbet kuşlarına... Gitmedim işte, Delirmedim de. Anlatan benim seni ve her şeyi. Ölmedim işte. Delirmedim de. Anlatan benim seni ve her şeyi. https://open.spotify.com/album/1fAHRAftczSdXs0u62jEWY  

2 min read I can't believe I’m writing this. It’s been 15 months! What the heck is that? I think my last blog post about PhD was ‘10 months report’. So, what happened in the last 5 months? So many things! But to recap, after my first-year progression review, I decided to take a few days off and it became forever. My best advice to the newcomers would be, never ever take a break for more than one week. Because it's so easy to lose track of what you've been doing. I had to read my progression review report a few times in order to remember what was doing.  But anyways. Due to lots of personal stuff, I had to take a few months off, and I restarted again in September with a new supervisor. Of course, when you give so much break, everything feels like the first time. I remember when I was reading an article in the library after a long time, I struggled so much that I started to question myself, ‘are we really working on the same area?’ But that's life. Sometimes starting ...