Recently, I realised that I do a lot of things half-assed. I go out of my way and try stuff. Meet people. For example, I’ll go to an event, join whatever it is, and talk to one or two people in between. But as soon as it finishes, I’m on my way. If they have a drink or supper planned afterwards, I won’t join. It’ll be too much for me. Too much what, I don’t know. Am I afraid to be too close to people? I don’t think that’s the issue. Maybe I’m just hitting my social battery by the end of the event, so I don’t have the mental capacity for more. But I keep doing this. Why am I rushing? Where am I rushing to? To my single room, where no one is waiting for me? Absolutely not. I’ve noticed this a few times recently. There was a hike I joined, and I spent five hours with those people. But afterwards, it was dinner time, and we all went to a food court. And though most people sat at long tables to keep chatting, I ate by myself. It wasn’t a sad occasion. I was actually very blissful about...
Everything starts with a dream.